Ryan: How did you travel?
Elizabeth: We took the subway to 33rd Street, then we took the ferry to the island. It ended up taking us only an hour each way.
The first conversation had very short answers with little information. The second one asked for more detailed information and invited Elizabeth to open up more.
Close-ended questions elicit a one- or two-word answer. This type of question usually begins with words like when, where, which, who, do, and are.
It’s much better to ask open-ended questions that encourage people to generate longer and more interesting conversation. Open-ended questions usually begin with words or phrases like what, how, why, and in what way.
Examples of Close-Ended Questions and Open-Ended Questions
Close-ended question: Who are you going to vote for?
Open-ended question: Why are you voting for that candidate?
Close-ended question: What kind of a job do you have?
Open-ended question: How did you get interested in your line of work?
Close-ended question: Did you like the last speaker?
Open-ended question: What did you agree with that the last speaker said?
Close-ended question: When did you start playing baseball?
Open-ended question: What do you like best about baseball?
As the other person is talking, make appropriate comments to show that you’re listening and understand what they’re saying: “Really? Wow, that’s something!” “I didn’t know that happened.” “I’ll bet that was fun!”
If you use two these tips in your upcoming conversations, you’ll find they go more smoothly. In general, people love to talk about themselves, and by making sure the other person talks at least half the time and asking open-ended questions, most people will feel you’re a brilliant conversationalist.
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